The Lies that Bind You

I have a big problem: I love to read. I am curious about (it seems) everything. The bigger problem is that I don't really have time to read all that much, so I save it for "another time." This "time" in my mind is the lie. As long as I choose to believe it, I keep magazines, newspaper articles, books. For a long time. Years. Since I was not paying attention to my reading while in Middle School (over 30 years ago now) or perhaps, I felt I should have retained the information, I even have my Jr. Scholastic magazines. They are so cool!! Things about how 18-year olds will vote, cool ads with that early 70s flavor, articles about countries that no longer exist as they did back then. At this point, the collection may land me some change via Ebay, but really! I know I kept them to read them, but now I just don't want to part with them.
Then, I have a year's sub to Ceramics Monthly. I've not thrown clay or mixed a glaze since 1980, but they are here in my basement. And the year I decided I would paint and enter shows, I got American Artist. Still here, 18 years later. No surprise.
Dad passed onto me his Smithsonians. Those are so pretty! A whole article about turquoise and turquoise jewelry. Can I miss that? I have so far. Same with Kachina dolls and Matisse paintings. Then we have those great offers from Better Homes and Gardens, which only charged $12.00 per year. Endless articles on gardens and cooking and decorating, all my interests. What if I need an article on interesting sandwiches? It is more likely I will look it up on the net or ask someone.
I used to get the paper at home, which is a total fire hazard! I will skim thru, find at least one article I want to "spend more time on," and then fold that page up and think I will get to it later. Since that does not happen, the whole stack of pages, which is harmless enough, gets filed to read later. And after that, several stacks follow until a large pile deserves... A Box.
We don't dare get a paper at home any more.
There are others like me out there. I know at least four others who had or have the same issues. Three of them worked with me at, guess where: A magazine publishing company.
So, today, I went thru a few things. Did not read-- no time for that-- but I did notice the dates on some of those mags. If I ever decide to pitch them, I will be sure to sign up for a new subscription, and start over.

Aboard the Goodtime III

These guys definitely like being on the water, in the wind. It was a gorgeous night.

Thoughts upon finishing my 50th year

Yes, finishing (on my birthday, 50 years will have been completed), I see the same old problems I had half a life ago, mostly having to do with discipline.
And memory, short-term, that is. This week I forgot to do at least two things I rarely forget: one appointment and one commitment to help someone. These two things did not even cross my mind. I ended up pulling weeds and watching a classic movie during one, and going to the movies and pool during the other.
Other than that, I am tired. I started being a mom just last year. I did my stepmom stint starting 8 years ago. I had a hard time being disciplined and organized (note: I KNOW how to organize, but it takes time to DO IT) before kids, now it is nothing but a dream-- or a nightmare.
I've lost myself, or lost track of myself, somewhere. I don't know how I can possibly be a good example or role model for these creatures, but they still seem to like me, and even love me regardless.

Life

Life swings from one extreme to another for me, maybe for you? On one hand, we go on trips to the park and see beautiful things, do fun stuff like go on the Goodtime III, pick berries, swim a lot, etc. On the other hand, I get so tired of piles of dishes & laundry, wake up with headaches, am way in debt, way overweight, out of touch with friends too much. I am glad I don't wait for perfect conditions to get out and do those fun things. I am going to complete year 50 in less than a month, and I feel slightly old. I think the kids keep me young.

David Gilmour

This is what i look like under all my baggy clothes

My bedroom looks like that, too.
Actually, that is Rita Hayworth, with Nan Wynn on vocals.
From You Were Never Lovelier (1942).

I like this

The Moon and The Stars 3 by *natasha-cinnamon on deviantART

We Love Warm Weather

Our first day of getting out for vacation.

Spring has Sprung

In the 10 years I've lived in my house, I've never seen a toad in my yard. Yet, Destiny, our indigo child, found one the other day. I hadn't seen her in several minutes, so I looked behind the garage, and found her crouched down near the woodpile. She turned to look at me and quietly informed me that she and the toad were communicating. I am sure they were.

Have you ever seen them?

St. Pat's

Buttermilk Falls after heavy rain

The sound was fantastic.

Kota-man @ Buttermilk Falls

Sunset Pond

Rat Maze

Everywhere I go in the house, I turn on lights, even in the daytime, even in the lights are already on. I just cannot seem to find enough light. I need to go to Florida, and soon. I wear the same gray hoodie around, since it is warm, but it only serves to make my day grayer. My studio is in the basement, and the basement is loaded with stuff already, including my husband's office, where I can hear video game shooting, if he is relaxing. NOT relaxing to me. I need space! The living room is small, the kitchen is busy, my dressing room is cramped and has yellow wallpaper, which I hate. There are not enough windows. No place has enough windows for me. Spring cannot come soon enough. I try not to complain, but I do have my limits, especially on days I don't feel so good, like this week.
It will get better.

Why I Love to Sing

How did I miss this in December?

We'd never get this nowadays

Back in 1964, especially if you grew up in England, you would find this hilarious, which it is.. If any pop group performed Shakespeare today, people would figure it was a "Promote Reading and the Arts" show. I don't sense that U. S. youth are familiar with the arts so much today, especially theater. Enjoy the Fab Four in a section of Act V Scene I of A Midsummer Night's Dream, in which the Rude Mechanicals present their play of Pyramus and Thisbe at the wedding of Theseus and Hippolyta.

Happy Christmas!

Okay, everyone is out of school now. Des just came home with tons of gifts from school, including monkey sox and kitty slippers. The college kid is home and visiting with his best buddy. I get to go out to Lola tonight with my mom and siblings, a great and special break! Tomorrow I still have to shop for Gene Sr. and Jr., and had better get a Clarisse for Destiny or I will be in trouble.
The big news in my book is that our daughter and her husband (both in the Air Force) are expecting!
Best wishes to all. We've had a blessed year.

Random random random random insanity

Ack. My beagle is acking. He was sleeping a minute ago. He is 10 and he is happiness, just as Charles Schultz said. I think that is because beagles are so simple and loving.
He had to go out. The wind is so strong, it slammed the door. The wind chill is making the 24 degrees feel like 10. The sky is a deep navy gray, and the shocking white clouds before them are moving fast. The moon is hanging sideways in its last quarter and looks so strange and bright. Now the little guy is asleep on my bed.
I just talked to a couple I met on the radio a few years back, Fred and Jill. They are so fun and kind and loving, and they play good music. I miss people like that in my life -- I used to have lots of them. Anyhow, I just won a certificate to a restaurant, here at 11:30 pm. It was great talking to them. I feel like it is so rare to be in touch with people like that. Now Gene and I will have another place for a date night, if we can ever find a babysitter. Twenty more minutes and I wake him up to sit shotgun in the plow truck. They are playing the Traveling Willburys, one of my favorite groups ever.
The dishes will wait until tomorrow. I made a crummy dinner tonight and don't want to be around the dishes. A couple people liked it.
My studio waits.
The house looks nice inside, to me, at least, except for my room and the basement.
I started writing out Christmas cards today. We actually have new friends (or acquaintances) now since the kids came around, so I had a few more than usual.
We have an interim pastor, and I like him and his wife.
I am in choir.
Still no regular exercise. Still hate myself every morning around 4 am when my back hurts from all the extra weight and lack of exercise.
The kids went wacky tonight when they were running the Corvette into things (and each other) in the living room. Lots of screams. I stayed out of the way while I cooked my crummy dinner.
This week is doctor week. Tuesday is the plastic surgeon for Dakota, and I will cancel the Wednesday asthma test for now. Thursday they all go to counseling. Friday Kota gets rechecked for his skin issues. I am tired already.
Our college student has to go to jury duty all week. Tomorrow he has to get downtown by 7:50. Wear a hat!
I want to rip the wallpaper down in this room. I hate it.
Tomorrow I make a roast.

Christmas Month

The kids got gifts on the first of October. We were going to wait until Christmas, but decided to open them the day after Thanksgiving. Destiny got a Barbie tea set, Dustin got Brown's stickers, banner, etc. and Dakota got this awesome red truck that came with bling. It was funny. That weekend made us decide we would stretch out the season and not make everything about Christmas morning gifts. Last weekend we went to an event for families who are "kinship" families. It was put on by the county and was very well organized. Just walking in they got Shrek puzzles, scribblers and candy. The tables were all named after some Christmas thing, like Donner, Blizten, Frosty, etc. Around the outside of the huge room we were in were stations for face painting, beading, golf, beanbag toss and coloring. The "parents" sat on the inside and munched on snacks and met others while the DJ led people in line dancing, kareoke and Christmas trivia games. Santa was at the top of the steps and we got free photos, very nice ones, too. After our free lunch, as many kids as possible posed for a group photo to be sent to Jerry Springer, as he donated a great deal to the party. They held a thank you banner that everyone signed. After awhile, gifts were given out. Dustin got a huge yellow remote control Corvette, McDonald money, a basketball, 5 Hot Wheels, and tons of candy. Destiny got a Hello Kitty sticker/stamp book. Dakota got Spiderman dune buggy, Spiderman/Black Venom walkie-talkies, a Lego set and tons of candy. Destiny did not fall apart for getting less than her brothers! They enjoyed these things all week, too. Today, we went to another kinship event, and the set up was similar, with the kids on the outside making things and the adults sitting down. This one was a potluck. A woman from the Cleveland Public Library spoke and she was a great speaker! She was a preacher for the system, I swear. Very entertaining. Then we had a workshop on capturing your memories of your family and past, as well as looking at your family tree. I loved hearing these elderly Black women's stories. One woman and her sister were raised with two white sisters in New Orleans, and she shared how they were raised to be orderly and obedient. She ended up going to school to be an educator, and was happy to get out of the way when she met up with the attitudes of children today.
We also sang some songs, the kids saw Santa and got a free book of their choice. They handed us a bag of gifts when we walked out to the lobby. The gifts were unbelievable! Dustin got a tank, army men, a nighttime spy cam, a camera, a Marines cap & fatigues. Dakota got two more Spiderman figures. Destiny got what she was hoping for, Littlest Pet Shop pets! LOTS of them. She could not be happier.
By this time, it was getting snowy. We went to yet another party, and this one was Scottish. My mom managed to save us a table. The Heather Belles danced, as well as the Jenny May Dancers. We had plenty to eat and Santa was led in and out by the bagpipes. Dustin got a Quizzer, Dakota got a Magnadoodle and Destiny got beading. We were all so tired and went home and played. Actually, I went to bed for a nap. It was GREAT.
So, we are loaded with gifts for the kids. This includes the slippers I bought them all with the Target gift card someone gave us annonymously and the dinosaurs their mom bought them yesterday at the mall.
We are so blown away with everyone's generosity. BLOWN AWAY! God is comforting us so much by how others are reaching out to make sure the kids are taken care of. We look forward to a lifetime of paying it forward...