Blah

I am tired. I woke up at 5 something, did some email stuff and then returned to bed at 7, after I tuned in the tv to cartoons. The kids found them a couple minutes later, Gene got up and got breakfast going and I got 2 hours of additional sleep.
The kids get into a daze when they watch tv, so it is good we hardly let them see it. Before they came, they watched it in their own rooms, and had cable. In any case, I started my day extra late then, and was behind the rest of the time. I just finally got laundry in and it is almost 9 pm. Got lots of other things done, though. Went to a craft show, one of the bigger ones in the area, and it was all about the snowmen. They were everywhere, on sleds, in buckets, hanging from trees, standing next to trees, holding lights, etc.
I finally pulled out Tip-It, from under my bed. I have the same version I played in the 60s and the kids loved it. They made sounds and laughs that would have delighted toymakers. Dustin won all 3 games. It was a good game to help them learn to observe (which peg is heaviest, which can use some discs), be careful and count.
We are painting the living room for the first time in 10 years. Gene re-did the window frames.
That is all for now.

TV is so boring

Especially when you only have a few channels. It's not a big deal-- I have plenty to do, but now and then like to sit there and flip my um... (3 in good weather-5-if I move the rabbit ears-8-19-maybe 25, 43, and if I am in the mood for Spanish, 61) SEVEN stations. The bummer is, everywhere you look during the day are 1. Commercials to sue Someone Responsible For You Being Home At This Hour, 2. Commercials to get you to go to chef school, medical terminology school, electronics school or to some cheap college so you can get further in your loser life, 3. Commercials for CHEAP car insurance so you can drive to these places (and hope you don't have to use #1.), 4. STUPID FAKE COURT SHOWS, 5. Ladies-Who-Scream-in-the-Audience Shows (like the View or Martha or Oprah), 6. Shows that reveal weird or scary or sad things, like Jerry, Montel, Oprah, etc.). I can skip all these since I have plenty going on during the day...
At night, you have only two choices: 1: Reality TV, mostly with some competition where you have to phone in a vote, or 2: Dead Bodies on Metal Tables being poked, zoomed in on, argued over, shaved, rolled out, or something. Usually, this is accompanied by cool dance club music and lights that are cool and pretty. The people doing this work are always very gorgeous and witty and intelligent.
I am sick of TV.

It's a Colorful Life

I got to raise my stepson from the time he was 13, but now I am getting the chance I missed to be a full time mom to little ones.
I just tucked in all three kids and am back down on this floor, piled with laundry to sort, dishes to wash, papers to put away-- all the stuff you see in houses with families with kids. There is even a ball in the driveway and a bike only half in the garage. The light was left on in the bathroom again, and there are tub toys on the edge of the tub. Our house is small and in many places, unfinished. When we leave one thing out of place, you can tell. We need kitchen cupboards and counters, a new floor, new windows, carpeting, paint, and all sorts of things, but whatever. The cool thing is seeing a little boy peer out the window of the bus each day, happy to see someone is waiting for him. Then I get to hear his report, which is usually, "HAPPY!" then walking home with his little hand in mine, hearing all his stories while he jumps along. Then there are more cool things like hearing the little girl singing in the while steering the red car of the grocery cart-- she makes up all the tunes and words, and they are beautiful. Then watching the oldest child run out and play football for the first time in his life is awesome. He plays hard and never gives up. These kids are neat because they basically get along. They really look out for each other and share a lot. When one buys something at the dimestore, it is always in threes. They have feelings and they show them. They are curious and they ask. They have fun and sleep well. It does not bother me that they are not "mine" and that I was nearly 49 when they moved in. This is a dream life for me and my husband, and I hope the kids will feel that way about it too.

Me and Color

I took the free ColorQuiz.com personality test! Pretty simple, but rather accurate... Click here to read the rest of the results.

Stepmothering Part II

We recently took in our nieces 3 children ages 6, 8 & 10. This is the 3rd or 4th time they had been "offered" to us; this is the first time their mom actually gave them to us for daily care, other than when she was shipped out to help with Katrina cleanup for a month.
More on this later, as I am so tired! It is 12:30 am and we started early.

Addendum

Shortly after I wrote about my beloved former co-workers, I attended the vistation at the funeral home for one of them, Bruce Jablonski. It is possible that Bruce passed on the very day I was writing. He was not seen for a little while, his neighbor noticed this, and then he was found in his house when his brother came to see. Bruce was only 57.
I know we fell out of contact for a couple reasons, one being the fact that I was layed off and we no longer worked together. Another would be that I got married around the same time, so I was kind of busy and distracted. We usually had pretty good conversations. He was very talented, and was kind of a recluse. He played banjo, the "Kingston Trio" kind of thing, was a good painter and illustrator, and loved to cook. He took roasting a chicken very seriously.

With Whom Do You Work?

I worked at one place for twelve years. It was a department in a large company, and we occupied half the 6th floor of an office tower. The amazing thing about this art department was how the people in the group seemed to all get along. The sharing and friendship was great. We spent time visiting, attended weddings, had great parties and back rubs and shoulders to cry on were not unusual. I and many others give credit to the people in charge, Larry and Lou, for knowing who to hire. It was a special place and time, and until the company fell upon bad times, we stayed together. I was one of the first layoffs, over 8 years ago. Now, a department of about 60 is down to only a few. Some retired, some died, others we've never seen again, and several of us are still in touch to this day. I freelanced a bit, had some longer stints, but nothing has ever compared to working at Penton. I worked at one place for almost 3 years, and that was a nightmare of screaming, gossip, anger, and wasted energy. It never got better. After 3 years of more freelancing, I got a job at a really good company. They do everything right. I am so impressed with the place. What amazes me, though, is that some women, even though there for almost 20 years, seem to be no closer to each other than acquaintances. Even worse, they can be so cold and amazingly unfriendly and close-minded. The men in my department seem to be much more human. I am happy with the company, okay with the work, but it is a weird experience to have to work at someplace so different than Penton. You would think that if you spent most of your time at a place, you would try to make it as pleasant an environment as possible, but I guess that is not the way it is everywhere.

here it is

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We are getting old

We hope to move to the Smokies one day. Gene is learning banjo and I started watching NASCAR. We ought to be ready soon. These are our neighbors-to-be, I hope.

I just love this

White and Nerdy

Can it really be March already?

Life has changed quite a bit since I work full time outside the home now. It is good, but different. I miss blogging, but I will get back to it eventually, just like weight lifting, cooking, cleaning, reading, traveling, etc. I must think I will live to 500 or something.

Drippy Saturday

Not blogging much because I found fulltime work.
We have an abundance of birds in the back today. When you open the door, it sounds like a jungle. I am not sure what most of them are, but there are large bunches of blue jays out there. It is like watching heavy traffic outside the kitchen window.
The rest of 2006 will probably go quickly. As soon as Halloween was over, the Christmas music started playing on the intercom at the stores. The decorations are so bright and beautiful, I like going to the stores at this point. I think I get more excited about Christmas now, than when it arrives. But I ramble. Gotta leave for work now.

She Who Makes No Sense

On Father's Day, 2001, 2 of my 3 stepchildren were packed into their mother's car and moved out of state, without warning, legality, communication or reason. When my husband went to pick them up for their summer visitation, he found their trailer empty. The youngest had just turned 10, the middle child was about to turn 12. The oldest child, was about to turn 14, lived with us, but was not even given a chance to say goodbye to his siblings or mother.
What do you do when this happens? First instinct is to call the police. The reply from the police is to call your lawyer. What if you don't have one? What if you would like to hire one but live 3 counties over from the courthouse you have to use? What if no one in your area wants to practice out there? Who do you trust when all the references you are given are local? What good does hiring a lawyer do when you feel your children are kidnapped? Who has time to shop for lawyers at a time like that? And, if you do find one, how will you pay for it?
In the meantime, where are your children? Will they call? Will they write? Do they need help? Will the stepfather that drove your oldest son off now be abusing the other two? Who cares about this problem? Who can help? If something illegal was done, who can help and how soon?
Well, we got a lousy lawyer. He was no help at all. He did next to nothing. The mother of these children simply got away with what she was doing by not being compliant. The judge ordered certain things, and she simply did not do them. Who was to prosecute her several states away?
Now it is 6 years later. The oldest, who went through great depression and healing, is now in college. The middle one has graduated early from High School, from what we hear. The youngest is mentally ill. The children were told, as the car was driving off from their old town, into their new, that they ought to forget their father and their brother-- they have a new life now. They were moved from one school to another (at least 6 schools in 5 years) and one living place to another, and this from a woman who claimed her ex-husband did nothing but move. She Who Makes No Sense also hops from one job to another, and this is also from a woman who claimed her ex-husband could not hold down a job. In reality, he's lived in the exact same place for the past 8 years and worked at the same place for 6. She Who Makes No Sense seems to think that whatever she has a problem with is not a problem. She simply projects what she does onto her ex-husband, and claims he does it.
Which leads us to today. Today she decided that it was her ex-husband's fault that her youngest was in the mental institution. Yet, it was SWMNS who decided to move these children away from their father, with whom they had a very good relationship. She has imagined that their father begged and bargained to have these kids move back, but in reality, nothing was brought up about the subject: he had so little time to visit with them on the phone, he would not bring those things up-- only what the children were up to in their lives and how school was. If the children made these other stories up, she has based her actions on these imaginings only. SWMNS seems to blame everything on a man who has not even had access to these children in several years. Even when she was in town, she had a way of acting as if crimes were committed against her hours ago, when in reality, she and her ex-husband had no contact.
It is our dream that the children will call, come to see us, and open up communication. My theory is that it is too much for a child to have to balance the two parents' personalities in their minds and that they simply settle for one, for survival's sake. As long as they try to pretend the other does not exist, they don't have to be in pain about missing their dad. I also believe that because the mother's personality is so strong and controlling, they simply want to please her and make up stories about things that never happened, especially conversations they never had.

For the Dedicated Couch Potato

You Want One

Giant Cement Birds

What a good idea

When will it change?

Mixed feelings

Well, we all have different feelings about this dreadful anniversary-- dreadful because we wish we did not have to commemorate ANYONE getting murdered by people flying things into buildings-- we wish they were ALL STILL WITH US-- But an Anniversary to be Observed, nonetheless. I am one of those people who will sit and listen to each name read, as long as it takes, although I did not have cable to do that for me this year. But each family has immeasurable pain, some with healing, some not. What I think about are the "in-between" people: partners who were not married and cannot participate in benefits or ceremonies, people who were severely injured and are suffering daily, people who still have not been able to find a single sign of their loved ones-- I think of you often and offer prayers for you, not just today, but during the year.
The NY victims seem to be focused on more than all the other locations of victims-- why the media does this is more likely a case of being right on the scene than for any other reason, but I bet some people feel forgotten.
I noticed the people who would rather forget are those who were at Ground Zero immediately, and could not let themselves leave, not even for a day. The smell of death and the images of horror are still fresh in their minds and they try hard to forget, daily.
Then there are those so far away from the locations, who are now fearful, suspicious and nervous about life. Next to them, we have those folks who are nearly obsessed with the attacks, and wear t-shirts, buy coins, photos, plates, statues, etc. that remind them and keep the crisis alive.
It is very encouraging to see the amazing healing and peace of many Survivors. I am always glad to see people who have been able to get to this point when they have the commemoration on TV.
I wish our global view had changed more in the media, but it has not. We still hear less about those overseas than about pop stars and their divorces. If you want to find out what is going on anywhere, it seems you have to watch BBC news and do your web homework. It does not help the general mentality of the country, though, to be still separate from the rest of the world. The event could have been a great springboard to intelligent reporting, but I guess not. Why can't they get it??
Personally, it is hard to believe the whole thing happened. I taped what was on TV for the first 4 days or so, but never watched them again. I saved it for "posterity." I saved magazines, did screengrabs, etc. but it is so hard to get around this horrible thing.

Kinda Recent Sketches

I made these on July 23rd.