When I was in line at Marc's tonight, picking up some groceries right before they closed, a nice woman told me my tag was sticking out. I thanked her and fixed it, but I thought to myself that it just goes with my look. I had shopped for shoes and a new bag at Marshall's with my birthday gift from my brother, and I saw myself in the mirror. I am giant. I am now 100 lbs overweight. My hair is frumpy, my clothes are just there, and it feels ridiculous to shop. I remember being younger and actually caring about what I wore, and shopping for great outfits, finding matching jewelry, shoes, all that. Now, who is going to see me? Where would I wear it? I can find answers to that, or create them, and maybe I would come up with more places to show up if I had cool clothes. But when you are so heavy, you don't look good, NO MATTER WHAT. And you don't feel good, either. I am so uncomfortable sitting, sleeping, walking, driving.
So, I start to do something about it. I usually start with walking or cycling so I don't totally blow myself away set myself up to fail. Then I build up and do okay. Then I have no idea what happens, because I usually am all done in 2 weeks or less. I often get sick within 3 or 4 days. For instance, I worked pretty hard on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday. Today and yesterday I was really creaking. Yesterday I felt weak, exhausted and sick. Today was much better, but all my joints are sore and I have a sore throat. I don't mind muscle pain, but joints are a bummer. I don't want bursitis, since it lasts so long.
In any case, I did buy the correct foods and plan to go to the gym tomorrow, or do anything-- tapes, walking, etc.
